What the Car?! – The Game That Cannot Even

What the Car?! – The Game That Cannot Even

As I was playing Triband’s new game, What the Car, I found myself asking questions such as “who is this game for?”, “what is the point of this game?”, and “why are there so many puns?”. Only now that I’ve finished it, I’ve realised these questions are similar to the ones We Love Katamari asks in the beginning of their game. I did not expect a game featuring a car with (sometimes) legs to give me such philosophical thoughts but i guess that’s all you can do in the face of such absurdity. 

Despite appearances, What the Car does have a story. Car and Bear are attending a party and they need to get there. That’s it. That’s the story. I never said it was very in depth now, did I? Anyway, Car needs to wear their legs to get to the party. You see, while Car can drive, they can also walk, swim and do a variety of things other cars can’t do. So, for some reason, the only way for Car to get to the party is for them to make their way through seven worlds. Each world is themed and requires generators to open a gate that will contain a friend to unlock the next world. Now that I’m forced to think about it, it doesn’t make much sense at all. Either way, this is what is needed to progress through the worlds.  

WHAT THE CAR screenshot
WHAT THE CAR screenshot

These overworlds are themed, but the game plays a little fast and loose with what that theme entails. For example, the sport world includes anything that may be considered sport adjacent, including games featuring sport as opposed to the sport itself. The overworld isn’t just a way to get between levels, it has a variety of activities and secrets all of its own. Finding bears with exclamation points above their heads often mean they have something to say or might have something interesting for the player to do. Aside from the events happening in the overworld, there’s trophies that can be found if players are willing to explore. It’s worth taking the time to see what else is around aside from the levels.  

Each world is made up of a series of 26 levels with a few extra ones that have been created using the track editor. Of course, just moving from level to level would be no fun, so 13 of the levels are in plain sight with the others hidden in the overworld. Upon selecting a level, Car starts in a cannon. When the player presses the launch button, the name of the level will be announced, along with the gimmick. To avoid becoming predictable though, there are levels without the cannon, but majority use the cannon as a start. Ultimately, the players goal is to complete the track. There is a timer and depending on the speed of completion, the player will receive either a bronze, silver or gold crown. Bronze is the lowest you can go, so as long as the level is completed, the player will get a crown. This makes sense as some of the levels should definitely give a crown for completion alone. Aside from the time goals that Triband has included for crowns, there’s also a leaderboard comparing the times from players all over the world. If this wasn’t enough to increase the replayability, each level has a card hidden in it that players can collect. This will often require tanking times in an attempt to get it, but it’s another reason to play levels more than once or twice 

WHAT THE CAR screenshot
WHAT THE CAR screenshot

Onto the levels themselves. They are incredibly varied and a lot of the time, players will have no idea what they’re in for before they light the cannon. It starts off simple enough. Car with legs running through the level. Car with small legs. Car with large legs. Car can only jump. Car can only jump with rockets. It’s bonkers. Just, absolute bonkers. Some propulsion methods will appear for a few levels, making sure not to overstay their welcome before moving onto the next crazy system of racing. I really cannot overstate how out there some of the levels are. There’s a level where Car is making burgers at a drive thru. Yes, this is still timed technically making it a race, while not moving anywhere. There’s a level where Car has too many wheels. Just…wheels everywhere, all over Car. There are levels where Car is riding a giraffe who is a skateboard. There are foosball levels, water levels, hot wheels levels and high heel levels. It is insane what Triband has managed to squeeze into this absurdly silly game. 

Luckily, most levels are incredibly short, taking about a minute to complete. This prevents the wacky mechanics from outstaying their welcome and turning from “novelty” to “annoying”. This can sometimes be an incredibly fine line to tread, but Triband has done a brilliant job of it. Although rarely, I did find myself getting frustrated, but luckily majority of my fails made me laugh rather than groan. I’m not an overly competitive person, so I often completed a level and moved on, but I know that for other players getting the golden crown on all 26 levels in a world will be a priority. I like that the game gives me that option to move on without having to complete everything if I don’t want to. I had a few issues with sim sickness (it feels like I’m having it more often lately) but due to the short nature of the levels, I was able to power through it. The game is technically seven worlds long, finishing with the party, except it doesn’t actually finish. The absolute mad lads at Triband are still adding worlds and levels. As of this review, Eight and Nine are both out with Ten on its way. They’re asking players what worlds they want to see next and keep adding more, even though they already have enough content just with the player created levels alone! It honestly seems like the team is just having a lot of fun, so why not? 

WHAT THE CAR screenshot
WHAT THE CAR screenshot

I think What the Car is a great game that absolutely made me laugh at times with its complete absurdity. It’s enjoyable enough for me, but I feel completionists and those with a competitive streak will get a lot more out of it than I ever would. It took me three hours to “complete” the game, but I didn’t bother looking for any of the extra levels or even attempt to get gold crowns, so it will definitely be a lot longer for other players. At the beginning, I said What the Car had me asking a variety of questions and by the time Car and Bear had their party I had found the answer. Unsurprisingly, it ended up being the same answer to the Katamari questions too. Fun. Who is this game for? Anyone who wants to have fun. What is the point of this game? To have fun. Why are there so many puns? Because it’s fun. Ultimately, that’s what What the Car is. Pure, unadulterated fun.